Well, maternity leave is over and it's back to work. Officially now for two days - they've been hard days. I love my job, but I hate leaving my baby. I know he is in capable hands, both when Jared is home and when he's at the babysitters. But, no one is better than mom and it's been hard. Perhaps it's the lack of sleep, I'm always grumpier without plenty of sleep - Cannon is sleeping between 5 and 6 hours each night, so I shouldn't be sleep deprived, that doesn't change how exhausted I feel. Maybe it's the cutting back on all the comfort food I've been eating. I gained too much weight and it's time to get rid of it. Too bad it's much more fun gaining than it is losing. Maybe it's the lack of time that I feel, all I've wanted to do since getting home is sit on the couch and hold my baby. If I do that - I just feel guilty because the other kids aren't getting their homework done, laundry isn't folding itself and the house chaos goes into overload (who knew so many things could mysteriously jump off shelves and onto the floor!).
I know that it'll get better, it always does. I'm just ready for it to happen today or tomorrow, not in a few weeks or months.
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